Maxwell Hammer's shared items

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Jessica Simpson side boob




The guys at the Superficial are saying that she has giant, saggy boobs. I've come to the conclusion that everyone that works for the Superficial is gay.

Pee-Wee Hates SNL

The whole reason PeeWee Herman started his show was because he was turned down for Saturday Night Live.

Also, for some bizarre reason, he seemed to think Gilbert Gottfried would get the job.

Pee-wee may be heading back to his Playhouse. But for now, he's happy to be Paul Reubens.: "Another interesting tidbit was his outrage at not getting cast for 'Saturday Night Live' in 1980; he believed that Gilbert Gottfried was a friend of a producer and the fix was in.

'I was so bitter and angry, I thought, 'You better think about doing something to take this to the next level,' ' Reubens said, describing his plane ride home from New York. 'So I borrowed some money and produced this show. I went from this 'Saturday Night Live' reject to having 60 people working for me.'"

Restaurants object to K-fed Superbowl ad

6abc.com: Restaurant Group Objects Superbowl Ad: "Nationwide Mutual Insurance Co.'s 30-second spot shows Federline, who is estranged from pop princess Britney Spears, performing in a glitzy music video. However, the punch line is that he's daydreaming - while cooking french fries at a fast-food joint.

The ad amounts to a 'strong and direct insult to the 12.8 million Americans who work in the restaurant industry,' wrote National Restaurant Association President and Chief Executive Steven Anderson in a letter to Nationwide CEO Jerry Jurgensen."


If K-fed was working at a restaurant, that's exactly what would happen to him. How can you protest the truth?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Tom Cruise thinks he's Jesus

TOM Cruise is the new “Christ” of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.

The Mission: Impossible star has been told he has been “chosen” to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.

And leader David Miscavige believes that in future, Cruise, 44, will be worshipped like Jesus for his work to raise awareness of the religion.



Does that mean we can crucify him? I want to be the Roman soldier with the whip! Link.

Mena Suvari Topless

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Jessica Biel at the beach





Love that butt.

Lindsay Lohan escapes rehab


It also looks like she's got a cocktail in her hand.

Andre the Giant, world's greatest drunk.

Andre knew he would die young because of his disease. The same disease that made him so big.

So he decided to stay drunk his whole life.

Modern Drunkard Magazine Online: "You won’t find it in the Guinness Book of World Records, but Andre the Giant holds the world record for the largest number of beers consumed in a single sitting. These were standard 12-ounce bottles of beer, nothing fancy, but during a six-hour period Andre drank 119 of them. It was one of the few times Andre got drunk enough to pass out, which he did in a hallway at his hotel. His companions, quite drunk themselves, couldn’t move the big man. Fearing trouble with cops, they stole a piano cover from the lounge and draped it over Andre’s inert form. He slept peacefully until morning, unmolested by anyone. Perhaps the hotel people thought he was a piece of furniture.

Think about it: 119 beers in six hours. That’s a beer every three minutes, non stop. That’s beyond epic. It’s beyond the ken of mortal men. It’s god-like. "

Monday, January 22, 2007

Tom Arnold at Sundance


Here's Tom stocking up on free stuff in anticipation of the long winter ahead. Tom will hibernate under a freeway in LA until spring. That's when the annual migration of the casting agents will begin. In the spring the casting agents move from their homes in the mountains to their offices in Hollywood. Then they will begin pitching tv shows to the networks. Those shows will be cancelled by winter, then the agents will begin their long trek back into the mountains where they go for "hiatus". It's all part of the wonders of nature in Hollywood.

Good luck, Tom! Hope you make it through another winter. And watch out for your natural enemy, Roseanne.

Chewbacca and R2D2: the secret leaders of the rebellion?

A New Sith, or Revenge of the Hope: "Consider: at the end of RotS, Bail Organan orders 3PO's memory wiped but not R2's. He wouldn't make the distinction casually. Both droids know that Yoda and Obi-Wan are alive and are plotting sedition with the Senator from Alderaan. They know that Amidala survived long enough to have twins and could easily deduce where they went. However, R2 must make an impassioned speech to the effect that he is far more use to them with his mind intact: he has observed Palpatine and Anakin at close quarters for many years, knows much that is useful and is one of the galaxy's top experts at hacking into other people's systems. Also he can lie through his teeth with a straight face. Organa, in immediate need of espionage resources, agrees.

For the next 20 years, as far as 3PO knows, he is the property of Captain Antilles, doing protocol duties on a diplomatic transport. He is vaguely aware of the existence of the princess but doesn't know much about her. Wherever 3PO goes, being as loud and obvious as he always is, his unobtrusive little counterpart goes with him. 3PO is R2's front man. Wherever they land, R2 is passing messages between rebel sympathisers and sizing up governments as potential rebel recruits - both by personal contact and by hacking into their networks. He passes his recommendations on to Organa. "

Sunday, January 21, 2007

The hot new male fashion will be stirrup pants!


That's right, men will be wearing leggings this year. It's all the rage.

Yeah, right. I think a vampire on Buffy said it best, "It won't be the new style if I kill every single person who wears it."

Leggings made of microfiber cotton and wool, shown in violet, forest green and Milan fog gray, all of them with stirrup straps, except of course for a couple of them cut above the knee, accompanied half the looks in this poetic, polished and unexpected collection.

Link.

Testify!

Rage Against the Machine to reunite, report says - Yahoo! News: "LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The leftist rock band Rage Against the Machine will reunite after a seven-year hiatus for a single performance at a southern California rock festival in April, the Los Angeles Times reported on Sunday."


I had wondered what happened to Zach de la Rocha, everyone's favorite little revolutionary. I figured he was off in Mexico fighting with Shining Path guerrillas or something.

DiCaprio hated Titanic

Leonard Dicaprio said Titanic made him want to quit making movies, which is a coincidence, because it made me want to stop watching them.


DiCaprio: 'Titanic' made me want to quit - Yahoo! News: "'It was pretty disheartening to be objectified like that. I wanted to stop acting for a little bit,' he said"

The losers of American Idol


This site collects the myspace profiles of all the losers on American Idol. Seen here is MetroAmish.

Britney going bald?

This site says she's going bald from worrying about...well the white trash train wreck that has become her life.

I think she's didn't brush her hair after sleeping on it.

Stars Are Blind » Britney Spears going bald, almost spills the goods

Friday, January 19, 2007

Stephen Colbert steals microwave, show

AP Covers the Colbert-O'Reilly Meeting of the Giants: "It may have been a greater error allowing Colbert into the Fox News headquarters, located near the 'Colbert Report' studios in Manhattan. There, Colbert smuggled a microwave out of the green room, a bounty which he proudly displayed at the conclusion of his show.

A spokesman for Fox News confirmed that Colbert stole the microwave, but said it was all in good fun."



Bill is so dumb he doesn't even know when he's being setup.


"This was a huge mistake, me coming on here," he muttered.

Lindsay Lohan, rehab in Wonderland

Apparently the place where Lindsay Lohan is in rehab is the same place pornstar John Holmes is alleged to have killed someone.

Located in the hills of L.A.'s famed Laurel Canyon, Wonderland shares its name with Wonderland Drive, a local street—and site of the infamous 1981 quadruple murder that saw porn legend John Holmes implicated. The Holmes case was retold in a 2003 film, also named Wonderland.

Link.

Dethklok Lyrics


Metalocalypse Theme Song


Dethklok!
Dethklok!
Dethklok!
Dethklok!

I'm... ticking... for... the...
Dethklok!
Dethklok!

Skwisgaar Skwigelf taller than a tree,
Toki Wartooth not a bumblebee,
William Murderface Murderface Murderface,
Pickles the Drummer doodily doo ding dong doodily doodily doo,
Nathan Explosion.




----------------------
Duncan Hills Coffee


Do you folks like coffee?
Real coffee,
From the hills of Columbia?
The Duncan Hills will awake you,
From a thousand deaths.
A cup of blackened blood.
(Die, DIE!)
I'm dying for a cup.
Guatamalan blend.
Ethiopian,
French Vanilla Roast.
(Die, DIE!)
You're dying for a cup.
Prepare for ultimate flavor...
You're gonna get some, NOW!
And scream, for your cream!
(Solo- Skwisgaar Skwigelf)
DUNCAN HILLS
DUNCAN HILLS
DUNCAN HILLS
COFFEE!





----------------------------



Birthday Deathday


echo Many years ago today
Something grew inside of your mother
That thing was YOU!
YOU!
You! You! You! You!
Did she scream? Did she cry?
Only those that are born are ones that get to die.
One more year goes hurting by.
Body, organs ripping, rotting
Vile lungs a grotesque chorus
Birthday equals nothing for us
R S V P Please
For the death of me
You have little time
You're running out of life
Happy Birthday. You're gonna die!
Time-Time-Tick-ing
Birth-day-Death-day
Die-die-Death-day
Birth-day-Death-day



---------------------------------

(Hate) The Fan Song

You people out there give us something more than just record sales
You give us something to hate
And we hate you, you brainless mutants

Hate (16x)

You hunched and blinded mutants
living in chat rooms

You masturbate on the sheets
your mothers clean for you

You have lined my pockets
overflowed with gold

You're living with your parents
and you're 35 years old

You're a bunch of banks
that I'd like to rob

You're my online cash transaction
you're my future stocks

Transfer you like money
to a Swiss account

Spend you on an impulse
and zero you all out

Hate (16x)

I would like to get some sleep
but you keep buying all our things

My overhead is way too deep
for us to not make all these things

It's way too cynical, you see?
Hating what's supporting me

I am not you, I thank the gods
and if I were, I'd die like dogs

Die (30x)
DIE!

----------------------------


Mustakrakish,
Mustakrakish.

Now, we've never actually tried to awaken a troll before from a Finnish Necronomicon.
So please bare with us.
Here goes:
I call upon the ancient lords of the underworld to bring forth this beast and,

Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,
Take the land that must be taken.
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,
Devour worlds, smite, forsaken.

Rise up from your thousandth year of sleep,
Bring forth the decreed eternally.

I command you to rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise and,
Awaken.




----------------------------

Thunderhorse

Ride...
Ride...
Ride...
Ride...

Thunder...
Thunder...
Thunder...
Thunder...

Thunderhorse...
Thunderhorse...
Thunderhorse...
Thunderhorse...

Revenge...
Revenge...
Revenge...

Thunder...
Horse...
Thunder...
Horse...

Thunder...
Horse...
Thunder...
Horse...

Thunder, Thunder...
Thunder, Thunder, Thunder...
Thunder...
Thunder...
Horse...

Thunderhorse...
Thunderhorse...

--------------------------------
Dethharmonic



I want to keep my money

And give away absolutely nothing

To the government who moderates my spending

and obliterates depending on what time of the year

brutality is here

in the form of income tax

I'd rather take a fucking axe

to my face, blow up this place

with you all in it, I'd do it in a minute

if I could write off your murder

I'd save all of my receipts

because I'd rather you be dead

than lose a tiny shred of what I made this fiscal year

I'd rather you be dead than to maul your body in my second home

I'd rather you be dead than consider losing all my evil restaurants

Thursday, January 18, 2007

What's P-Diddy looking at?











link

Same dress controversy


Jessical Biel wore a dress that Hillary Swank had worn several years ago. Now her and designer Valentino are in a bitchfest over it.

Notice how Valentino doesn't actually deny that he sold the same dress twice.

“I loved this dress and felt great in it,” Biel said in a statement Tuesday, “It is unfortunate that I was told by Valentino no one had ever worn the gown before, but I think Hilary has amazing style, and I’m flattered we share the same taste.”

Not to be outdone, Valentino also issued a statement, though he didn’t specifically mention the Biel situation:

“Valentino dresses are timeless, and each woman brings to them her own interpretation. Two beautiful actresses can be different and great even in the same dress.”

And for good measure, here’s Treena Lombardo, fashion market director at W magazine, telling us her opinion about the situation:

“So who’s to blame? Ultimately, it’s the responsibility of Biel’s stylist and Valentino’s public-relations team to research gowns to be sure they haven’t been worn to high-profile events before. But in the harriedness of the season, people are just doing their best with a lot of gowns flying in and out of hotel rooms.” Link.

Free Slick Rick


The idiots at the Department of Homeland Security consider Slick Rick a terrorist.


Rap legend Slick Rick spent his 41st birthday,
January 14th, incarcerated in a Florida
immigration detention centre. Back in the
80s Rick was in the charts with Doug E Fresh
with The Show but now Rick's fighting deportation
to Britain, his birthplace, from where his
family emigrated in 1975.

Rick aka Richard Walters's career collapsed
in the 1990s when he shot his pregnant cousin
and her boyfriend in an argument where Walters
alleged they were trying to extort money. He
served five years and 12 days in jail then
saw his comeback album, featuring a who's
who of hip-hop inc Nas, Snoop Dogg, Outkast
and Wu-Tang Clan, bomb.

In June 2002, after performing on a Caribbean
cruise ship, Rick was arrested in Florida for
"deporting himself" and "illegally re-entering
the country". A new 9/11 inspired-law allowed
all felons with five years jail time not
(["mb"," born in USA to be deported. Walters spent 17
months in jail before being released then was
re-incarcerated last year, when the Department
of Homeland Security took up the case again.
Two months ago a US district court judge
ruled that he should not be deported but
Rick remains in the detention centre with
no official release date.

The US government must think terrorism
issues are now so minor that it wants to
spend so much time and energy on the security
threat posed by an aging black rapper. born in USA to be deported. Walters spent 17
months in jail before being released then was
re-incarcerated last year, when the Department
of Homeland Security took up the case again.
Two months ago a US district court judge
ruled that he should not be deported but
Rick remains in the detention centre with
no official release date.

The US government must think terrorism
issues are now so minor that it wants to
spend so much time and energy on the security
threat posed by an aging black rapper.

Tara Reid loves "House Music"


Tara Reid has been partying in Australia
over the New Year. One afternoon she and
her entourage wandered into a small Byron
Bay DVD rental store. "Do you have any
house music?" asked the actress. The
shop clerk looked confused and told her
that they didn't sell CDs, she should try
down the road. "No, but do you have any
HOUSE MUSIC" tried Tara again. When he shook
his head again, Tara left. A few minutes
later one of her people came back in the
store and pleaded with the clerk for some
house music before leaving in despair.

That night the DVD guy was recounting his
story in a local bar. He was told that another
DVD store sold drugs on the quiet, and that
"house music" meant you wanted some ecstasy.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Bob Dylan wrote all the songs

Baby Got Back? Written by Bob Dylan. MMM-bop? Written by Bob Dylan. Every hit song for the past 40 years has was written by Bob Dylan in the 60's.

Tia Carrere, still hot after all these years


Some nice cleavage there.

Rebecca Romijn @ Golden Globes

Rebecca really should have stayed out of the sun. She's looking really leather. Too late now...she'll be getting little cancers any day now....

Lindsay Finally in Rehab

We all knew you weren't really in the hospital for appendicitis. Get yourself cleaned up and looking good. You used to be so pretty.

Actress Lindsay Lohan enters treatment center - Yahoo! News: "'I have made a proactive decision to take care of my personal health,' the 20-year-old star of 'Mean Girls' and 'Freaky Friday' said in a statement. 'I appreciate your well wishes and ask that you please respect my privacy at this time.'"

The IT Crowd coming to America

They are in casting for an American version of The IT Crowd.

Let's hope it's better than the US version of The Office.

Misfits join NBC's "IT Crowd" pilot - Yahoo! News: "Based on a British series, the project revolves around three misfits who work in the information technology department of a large corporation."

Here's a youtube episode.

Britney pregnant again ?

She needs to get that ugly hoohaa sewed up or something.

Oops! Is Britney pregnant again ? - Gossip: The Scoop - MSNBC.com: "“I’ve seen her during the last two pregnancies and she has the same look now,” a “pal who sees Britney every week” told the mag. “She’s heavier, but that’s not it. It’s the sparkle in her eye. She always gets that sparkle when she’s pregnant, like she’s relaxed and happy.”"

Hasn't she ever heard of birth control?

Pink is very worried about the Australian Sheep Anus

First she said she was going to boycott the entire country of Australia because of...of all things...sheep being anally circumcised. Now she's changed her mind.

Undercover - Pink Backs Down On Australian Wool Boycott: "Late last year Pink appeared in a video for People for Ethical Treatment of Animals telling viewers to boycott Australian wool and showed graphic footage of mulesing, a surgical process done without anesthetics to remove the wrinkled skin around their anus.

There is debate whether a one-time painful operation is a better or worse fate than being eaten alive by maggots, which is what the operation prevents. (Flies can't lay their eggs in the warm and moist folds in the skin.)"

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

And there was much rejoicing heard about the land

They're going to cancel TRL! Yay! Of course, this means it just makes way for more suck.


New York Daily News - Daily Dish & Gossip - Ben Widdicombe's Gatecrasher: 'TRL' looks to be D.O.A.: "“The ratings are at an all-time low, around 300,000 viewers,” says the source. “The show is going to be canceled and rebranded.'"

Renee Zellweger Dating Luke Perry

Renee just loves the losers. Always picking them bad guys that treat her like crap. We all know that kind of girl.


E Canada Now - Breaking News » Renée Zellweger Dating Luke Perry: "A source told the New York Post newspaper: “They were definitely on a date. They both looked super-skinny. He was looking very grungy - baggy jeans, lumberjack flannel shirt and baseball cap. She had on a white button-down shirt, glasses and striped pants. They were talking very closely and rubbing knees.”"

Oooh, spooky, it's the ghost of Mary-Kate Olsen


Almost a nipslip there, as well.

Miss New Jersey is a ho

They must have picked the contestants for the Miss USA from out of a strip club.

Ashley Harder, Miss New Jersey USA, has resigned because she is pregnant, The Philadelphia Daily News reported in Monday's editions.

Harder, 20, told the newspaper she voluntarily stepped down because it's against pageant rules to compete while pregnant. She could not be reached for comment by The Associated Press.

Christina Ricci in chanins


I think someone in Hollywood is able to look into my mind. Get out of my head! I'm gonna sue!

Lindsay Lohan Gone Wild

Lindsay is dating the Girls Gone Wild producer.

What do you even say about something like that?

Link.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Jessica Biel @ Golden Globes


She looks good, but with Jessica, it's all about the butt. Maybe I'll find some shots of her walking away....

Reese Witherspoon @ Golden Globes


Ok, I really didn't even want to look at her pics. I was afraid. She's looked so horrible lately I was afraid it would be like a car wreck where you don't want to look, but you can't stop yourself.

But, overall, she's presentable. She used to be beautiful, but lately, not so much. She's pulled herself together a bit.

Tina Fey @ Golden Globes


Ok, I like Tina Fey, she's a great comedy writer and usually she's very pretty. But how long has she had that horrible scar on her face that makes her look like Freddy Krueger's sister? I swear I've never noticed that before.

Also, why is she wearing a puzzle piece on her lapel? Does she have kids and they got candy on it, maybe and it stuck to her dress and she didn't notice or something? What the hell?

J-Lo @ Golden Globes


She's not looking so great. You can tell she smokes by those lines she's getting around her mouth. Looks like she had a lot of botox as well. Look how wooden her face is.

Jennifer Love Hewitt's Golden Globes


Click on the pics for really big ones.

Gillian Anderson: Vampire or Satanist?

GILLIAN ANDERSON - ANDERSON IVE DRUNK THE BLOOD OF GOATS AND LAMBS: "'You crouch down and drink it straight off its neck. They pull the skin away and then you suck the hole. Goat is better than lamb. Lambs have a lot more fat on them, so the blood is very gloopy. I didn't feel particularly good after that.' "

She's supposed to be an animal rights activist. I eat one black rhinon hamburger and PETA gets all pissed off. Gillian Anderson, though, she can drink blood from an animals neck an no one says anything.

Rick, Ricky, no matter how you spell it, it still means loser.

The little blonde kid from Silver Spoons is changing his name back.

Call Him 'Ricky,' Not 'Rick' Schroder - Starpulse News Blog: "Rick Schroder has ditched his adult name for the one that made him famous as a child star. For his upcoming stint on hit drama 24, the actor will be credited as Ricky Shroder - the name he grew out of in his late teens.

He says, 'My agents said, 'You know, you should change your name to Rick. It'll help grow up from a kid to an adult.' I've learned in the last 20 years it takes more than dropping a letter from your name to help you grow up. And so I'm more comfortable being called Ricky. My wife, my mom, everybody calls me Ricky... Rick never felt right. I felt like I was trying to be something I wasn't.'"


They should really do a Silver Spoons reunion. Most of those people haven't worked in years. Poor Carlton from Fresh Prince. Always a sidekick, never the star.

Dude you're gettin a.... oh who really cares, anymore.

Dell Dude is waiting tables and having house parties.

According to the NY Daily News.

Times must be tough for former Dell guy Ben Curtis. The commercial actor/Tortilla Flats waiter, who was arrested in February 2003 for allegedly buying marijuana (the charges were later dropped), sent out a text-message invite for a party at his apartment this past weekend charging $5 "all u can drink!" Dude, you're getting desperate.

You know what? I waited tables for years. It's hard work. I'd much rather hang out with this guy than Paris Hilton or Jeremy Piven.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

50 Cent condoms

Rapper 50 Cent plans on launching a line of condoms. I wonder if people will get all confused and think that's the price.


Also, Whites and Asians can't use them, because, well, you know.

Full Story.

Leela had a baby!




The actress who does the voice of Leela on Futurama just had a baby.

The actress and her writer-producer husband Kurt Sutter, 43, welcomed their first child together, Esme Louise Sutter, on Wednesday, People reported.

They say it only has one eye.

Oh, yeah, she was also Peg Bundy on Married with Children.

Full Story.

Christina Ricci as white trash


This is from some upcoming movie, I'm not sure which. Anyone have more pics? Found on the Bastardly.

Run Forrest Run!





Lindsay Lohan running in a bikini. Only a professional smoker can run while holding a lit cig. Don't try this at home.

Notice the complete lack of an appendectomy scar? How can that be? She was just in the hospital to have her appendix out. Do they have some new magic way of healing scars just for the rich and famous? She should at least have a bandage....

Or mabye she was really in for an overdose? Nah, couldn't be our sweet little virgin. Not Lindsay. Never.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Pink is very weird







These are from a Pink concert Jan. 8th.

Harrison Ford is a racist!

He hates Wookies! They should send him to the same jail they sent Mel Gibson and Kramer to!

"Harrison was horrified. After that he was delighted to be playing Indy again. He told George he just couldn't face being stuck in a spaceship with Chewbacca again."

Full Story.

Charlotte Church: My kind of woman



Not only can she sing like an angel, she can party like an animal. Charlotte,

" threw back 10 sambucas, six vodka-Red Bulls, and a large pizza during a night of revelry in the French ski resort Chamonix over the weekend. The beefy lass went on to demand that her rugby playing boyfriend "Eat the fucking pizza, or I'll rub it all over your fucking face. Eat it or fuck off."

Full Story.


Snakes on a Plane 2: Scorpions on a Plane!

"My right leg felt like it was asleep, but that was isolated to one spot, and it felt like it was being jabbed with a sharp piece of plastic or something."

The second sting came after the plane had landed and the Sullivans were waiting for their bags at the luggage carousel. Sullivan rolled up his cuff to investigate, and the scorpion fell out.

"It felt like a shock, a tingly thing. Someone screamed, 'It's a scorpion,'" Sullivan recalled. Another passenger stepped on the two-inch arachnid, and someone suggested Sullivan seek medical help.


Full Story.

Trachtenberg vs Lohan



In this corner, we have Mean Girl, and alcoholic, Lindsay Lohan. In the opposing corner we have nice little girly girl, Michelle Trachtenberg.

Lindsay threatened to kick Michelle's butt at a club, recently.

“Those two hate each other, and Lindsay started screaming, ‘Get her the [bleep] outta here!” an “eyewitness” told the tab. “She was threatening to get physical and actually fight Michelle, saying, ‘I’ll kick her [bleeping] [bleep]!”

But, then Lindsay left right after, so she must be scared of Michelle.

Which one do you think would win in a fight? Vote now.

via the Superficial

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Kelly Osbourne in Playboy

She just wants someone to look at her.

She says, "I'd go fully nude, but I'd have to have some airbrushing on my tits."

That would probably be the most attention her tits have ever gotten.

Link.

Young doctors in love




The former Neighbours star met his bride-to-be Jennifer Morrison on the set of the hospital drama two years ago.

Spencer surprised his co-star, who plays Dr Allison Cameron to his Dr Robert Chase, by proposing during their recent Christmas holiday to Paris.

Both characters are engaged in a diagnostic medical fellowship with the series title character, Dr Gregory House, played by Golden Globe nominee Hugh Laurie.

The couple, both aged 27, have yet to set a wedding date, but will have to work around their hit show's film schedule.



But, but, I thought she was in love with House? She's a whore!

Scarlett Johansson in a see through dress

Anyone have pics of this? She says she went out in public to a major event in a transparent dress but won't reveal details.

She's vowed never to repeat her fashion faux pas after seeing pictures of herself in the transparent apparel. She says, "I won't tell you where and when because the pictures might be dug up again. "Now, my best fashion tip would be to check if your gown's transparent in a full-length mirror in a well-lit room every time you go out to a big event."

Link

Monday, January 08, 2007

my heroes


Nixon, Hunter S Thompson and Elvis. The heroes of Maxwell Hammer all in one room.

Did Screech use a schlong double?

Screech's sex tape was supposedly "leaked" to the press. But now it's coming out that it was a contract deal all along.

But the distributor claims that the dork on the tape isn't the real one. That's its a fake.

"I have reason to believe that is not Dustin's [manhood] in the movie," says the agent.

"You never see his face and his [manhood] in the same shot. If, in fact, he used a body double, I'm going to sue him for defrauding me, Red Light and the American public."


Full story.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

all there is to say

Xtina shows how to exit a car without exposing your vag to the world


In just 3 easy steps you, too, can learn not to be a complete whore!

Link.

Ewan Mcgregor shaves his chest



This he claims makes him look ten years younger and actually help him to get roles where he plays characters younger than he is.


God, what a sissy. Obi-Wan would never shave his chest.

Link.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Dita Dumps Manson

Dita Von Teese has served Marilyn Manson with divorce papers.

Sources say the raven-haired bombshell filed for the split right before Christmas, but Manson has been unaware of it because she couldn't get in touch with him.


full story

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Gross

Which Who's the Boss star has posted naked pictures of themselves on the web? Alyssa Milano? Wrong! Judith Light! Wrong! Tony Danza! Wrong!

Danny Pintauro, who played adorable Jonathan Bower on Who’s The Boss for eight seasons, has posted a personal ad on a gay Web site, describing himself as “sexy, passionate, fun, verbal, obedient (and) open to anything.”

Apparently he liked to be tied up and beaten while a man says, "Who's the boss now, baby? Huh? Say my name, bitch!"

Ashlee Simpson NipSlip

It's not safe for work. Contains nippilage. Link.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

The OC is being cancelled

Who cares? I never even watched an ep.

Link.

Brirney is in rehab

They made her go to teach her how to hold her liquor.

That's what they do in rehab. Teach you to drink more.

link

The Fed-Tard hits on Lindsay

K-fed recently texted Lindsay. Saying, "we shd get 2gther".

She was grossed out. She laughed at him, he called her "firecrotch", etc.

More, here.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The OCD list of stars who got started on Seinfeld


Such highlights as Jon Favreau, Michael Chiklis and Courtney Cox. Link.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Jessica Alba in a bikini




Why is it that everytime you see a hot chick in a bikini they are always scratching themselves or fiddling with their tits? Link.

Britney passes out

At a club, in Vegas...so apparently it's not true about what happens there stays there.

"By about one o'clock, she was just done, so we took her out," Spears' manager, Larry Rudolph, told The Associated Press Monday. "She was not drunk. She was just tired and falling asleep."

Rudolph denied reports circulating on gossip Web sites that Spears, 25, collapsed shortly after midnight and was carried out by bodyguards.


If they have to deny it, you know it's true. Link.





Paris is going broke

It seems she skipped out on the tab rather than pay an 8 dollar bill. Where's the tip?

The hotel heiress pulled a brazen move, according to Page 6, and stiffed a restaurant after scarfing down a hamburger, frappe and mineral water. Apparently, Paris needed to apply the $8 burger bill toward her $2,200 shopping spree for jewelry and lingerie. And where, prey tell, would she get the money to pay for the shopping spree? Not to worry...Paris was paid $5 million to crown the Bondi Blonde beer girl from a sea of scantily-clad beauties.

It seems to me that she wouldn't have gone to Ausstralia if she didn't need the money. She's an heiress, she's worth a fortune, isn't she? Or maybe she's been cut off or spent it all?

Steve Martin's thoughts on Saddam

Oh, my Saddam, how I loved your funny little ways. The way you held your teacup; the way you enjoyed those who coaxed a smile from you. I love that you found a way to exist in this mixed up world, how you thought, "why be mean when you can be nice?" Saddam, I will miss the way you would point to someone and then they would be dead, the way your puppy Pluto became a rug.


Link

Hey, look! It's Lindsay Lohan's ugly sister!


Say hi to Ali Lohan, everyone. She'll probably do something horrible soon, like release a cd with Britney's little sister.

From Fug.

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Angelina Jolie as the Virgin Mary

Link.

Paris Hilton's phone number leaked.

Apparently Paris Hilton's personal number has leaked. (415) 690-5482

I'm calling it. Here goes.

All I got was a message. I told her to call me back. I said she could say anything she wanted and I would publish it and not slant it.

I can be fair.

Of course if she doesn't call back I'm going to totally run her through the mud...not that I don't already.

But if she calls me then we could be BFF!

Thursday, December 28, 2006

More Miss Nevada pics


Apparently this isn't the first time. This one was taken in 2004 and has been on the web since then.

All the men Lindsay Lohan dated this year

Here are some highlights.

  • Lohan linked to John Lennon`s son Sean after the pair was spotted out several nights in a row together.
  • Lindsay vows to hit on Nick Lachey in order to anger his ex-wife, Jessica Simpson.
  • Lindsay seen with Keanu Reeves at an LA hotspot.
Full list here.